Ah, what can I say about myself, that hasn't already been said (with less accuracy) by Kenneth Starr about Bill Clinton?
I'm a child of the sixties who, when faced with the possibility of being drafted by the Army as a human target for the Viet Cong at age 18, out-thought the system and enlisted in the Coast Guard ... resulting in becoming a human target for Colombian drug runners on the open water. Years later, having been wounded three times in the line of duty and now stationed at a shore unit, I discovered -- to my immense surprise -- that the draft had been canceled prior to my fifteenth birthday.
This pretty much encapsulates my entire life ... and easily explains my paranoid need to keep abreast of current events.
I retired (medically) from the Coast Guard after better than 20 years of service to the civilians of my country, thereby becoming a civilian myself .. and discovering that I really don't understand civilians whatsoever. As a form of cheap therapy, I started writing. Now, eight years later, I'm an internationally read humorist and not a whit closer to understanding civilians.